The End of Everything

Who said, “all good things must come to an end,” or “nothing lasts forever” ??? Because I’m there. Finally. After seven years I am there. Has it really been seven years? I have to do the math: Columbus Day weekend 2002. Yes. Seven. Imagine that. I think of Natalie Merchant’s song, Seven Years,  and think yes, this fits. I am finally finished. Her lyrics are my theme song to a new beginning.

For seven years
You were so revered
I made offerings of
Anything and everything I had
You were
all that I could see.
~Seven Years, lyrics by Natalie Merchant

It all started in the most bizarre way. I shouldn’t have been there. All signs point to disaster yet I did not heed a single one. I don’t ski. I like my hobbies. I like my relationships. So, what was I doing? The makings of a bad idea from the beginning. Still, I followed along like I knew what I was doing. The word entanglement didn’t mean anything to me as long as I thought I could escape. Until I couldn’t.

Everything moved at a typhoon pace. Whirling around, lost in the fury of it. Obsessive and spun out, I was out of control without an intervention in sight. Dragging everyone around me down became part of the game. Then came the divorce. The meeting of the minds became a multitude of meltdowns. No one could work together. No one could work apart. Breaking up is so hard to do. It all started with the King and ended with a Kick. It became oh so contradictory and confusing. I began to Let Go. The grip that held me was losing strength. Soon, I lost it completely.

Years later and sanity is intact. Crisis averted. Interests diverted. I’m certified. Now I just need to re-register at the registry. Register my certificate of Officially Finally Finished. OFF.

Categories: Confessional, music | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

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