In September I nearly logged 50 miles of running. Mostly on the treadmill, but running just the same. In October I nearly logged 19.5 – nowhere near the numbers of September. Should I be beating myself up over this? No. Especially if I think about what I ran in October of 2008…6.45 miles. 6.45 miles total. This October is three times better than last year. So, why am I thinking I want to start over? Because I do. And so I am. Starting over. On August 1st, 2009 I vowed I would get back to the run, and for the most part, I have. I just think I have been going about it all wrong. Who says I have to run every other day, no matter what? I think October suffered because I burnt myself out. I suffered a breakdown of self. My passion for cooking took a back burner to the run. I read books without caring about the plot just so that I could log the miles instead. Nothing was done with enthusiasm because all I cared about was the run. It became more important to say that I ran it than to believe I ran it well. Does that make sense?
And so I start over. Last night I ran 2.73 miles as gently as I could. Partly because I haven’t been on the tread for over a week and mostly because I fought with leaves over the weekend. Who knew that yard work could beat me up so much? I took a serious thrashing from eight bags of leaves, a few rolled stumps and a bunch of well-pulled weeds. Four hours of yard work. I seriously couldn’t touch my toes the next day. Scratch my back? Forget it! Impossible. I was that sore. Tonight I will work out the tightness with a few yoga poses. I need to find my center. It’ll be just like starting over. Amen.